Melancholy

Time flies by so quickly, it seems as if we are travelling with the speed of light. Months have become days and years have changed into months, it was almost one month since I last wrote. 

Today I strongly feel to talk about depression. We are inundated these days with articles, surveys, and medical/ scientific updates on depression and anxiety; however, nothing so far has been absolutely successful when it comes to completely eradicating this disease. In fact, the more research and awareness we have the more rapidly depression is increasing.

There are very interesting views in our society about depression, some people believe that too much thinking causes depression- so stop thinking or think more positively and your problem will disappear. Some recommend daily exercise, while others suggest praying and seeking spiritual cures and so on.

Each of the above treatments are part of the overall depression-cure program, but what we lack in understanding that the thoughts that comes to our mind, work through an automatic process, our environment, family life and work situations, our past and our fears of future- all contribute to the incessant stream of thinking.

Exercising is great, but when one suffering from depression it becomes very difficult to even get out of bed and perform your daily work- let alone exercise.

A person who does not have the minimum physical energy to walk finds it hard to pray.  What is worth noting that an individual who suffers from depression is physically healthy and there is no dormant or apparent illness. It’s just that one does not have the energy to move.

Religions have identified this problem and many have cures for it, Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon Him) have in various Hadiths have mentioned treatments for anxiety and depression. The treatment was followed by many of Sahaba’s as well, most notably Hazrat Ali (R.A). He has prescribed to keep oneself clean, to perform ablution, to take baths and pour head with cold water.

Alternative medicine like reflexology, acupressure, reiki also make a huge difference in improving the overall mental, physical and emotional well-being.

To really cure this problem, first of all one needs to honestly accept that he/she is suffering from depression or anxiety. These two are by the way two sides of the same coin and have origin in fear. 

If you are suffering from lack of energy to the extent that it becomes difficult to attend to your daily work, have concentration problems and uncontrolled negative thinking, get cold sweats, mood fluctuation, sleeping problems, pain at the back of your neck, backaches, headaches, eating too much or too little- then these are all indications of depression.

Why it is important even critical to stop this menace as soon as possible, is because when we feel sad, depressed, anxious, afraid most of the time then our body start to secrete an enzyme called ‘glucocorticoid’ if it is secreted in huge quantities and for very long period of time then it would eventually lead to cancer. We can say that the last stage of depression in some cases is suicide or if you didn’t commit it then cancerous cells could be produced.

So first you need to understand that very clearly that it is okay to be sad and feel the pain, it is fine to depressed. However, it is important for you to decide that “Enough is Enough!”

§   Once you do that start keeping a diary or on your smartphone/ computer write (uncensored) whatever you feel and think every day.

§   At the end of the week, read what you have written. With this activity you will notice your thought patterns: your fears, who and what annoys you, past thoughts that are still lingering in your mind, what issues in your current relationships or from your childhood you are still holding on to.

§   Now, realize that all this is not real and you are not your thoughts, but they are only old incidents, unnecessary and outdated worries which are being played over and over again on a tape in your mind.

§   Past is gone and future is not here yet. Only this moment is with you where you can take necessary steps to take care of your issues. If lack of money or job/ work insecurity is the cause then start taking productive steps by saving, or looking for better options while you give your best to the work you currently have.

§   If someone from family is causing problems then try to face the issue with them, if there is any kind of abuse then talk to someone you trust.

§   Sleep 8-9 hours, drink plenty of water, make it your habit to do breakfast and eat well- do not starve yourself if you have weight issues.  

§   If exercise is not possible then do not push yourself, just take little walks in your room, stretch your back, hands and feet. Start with 3 minutes and slowly take it to 30 minutes in one or two months.

§   Find one person, whom you trust and talk to- there is always somebody.

§   Take anti-depressant, if prescribed by a doctor- but don’t rely on it 100% and forever.

§   Where colourful clothes, surround yourself with flower (s).

§   Paint, even if you don’t k now how to paint- because the use of colours will positively stimulate your brain.

§   Stop watching news and try to watch comedy films and plays.

§   Minimize the use of social media.

§   Avoid being in environment where you don’t feel happy, avoid toxic friends.

All the preceding cures are for the outer layer of your being, now it is time to get very personal:

Your income and employment should not have any dishonest or unfair dealings. Be honest and do not cheat, deceive or take undue advantage of any one.

Do not compete or compare yourself with others.

Strictly forbid yourself to be jealous of other people’s money and success. Be grateful for their success as you would be for yourself.

Ban yourself from creating any conflicts or misunderstandings in your family and at work.

Pray and fast- not to exhibit to the world your high levels of religiousness.

Stop appreciating and thanking your spouse on facebook, and express your love and appreciation to them in person.

Stop flaunting your wealth or relationships on facebook or instagram because there will always be someone else with more wealth and happiness to beat you in this never-ending stupid game.

Learn to say ‘No’ when  you don’t or can’t do something for others.

Stop worrying for everyone, and start to involve God in everything you do. Ask him to ease your pain and sorrow, ask Him to help you in dealing with in-laws, call His help to solve work problems, tell Him to help complete your assignments.

Actively get into a relationship with God, talk to him in your heart or loudly as if He is sitting with you.

Let Him worry for you and take care of your life, while you do everything practically possible.

Be grateful for every little thing in your life, especially for what you don’t have.

Ask for God’s forgiveness and show upon you His Mercy and Blessing. If God does not answer you call in the first attempt, hang up and call again. Be persistent.

There will always be times in your life when its not all rosy, when things will fall apart, or challenges will be thrown in your way, there will always be jerks in your life- and you have every right to be angry, sad or anxious but set a limit to every emotion. 

Never allow yourself to spiral down rather get up and command yourself to feel good, do good and be good. 

Have a great weekend.

Sonya Syed. (Day 564)