Women, weight & the society

It has been longer than I thought, but yes too many months have passed by, so here I am and I hope that this sharing and writing would take a continuous momentum. These days my life has been consumed by immensely pressurizing mental work of completing my PhD thesis. After hard labor of two years things are finally taking shape but it has been far more complex than I have ever thought. However, when I see something that should be shared along with my personal experiences then remaining silent is unforgivable.

Today I want to share with you a video of a lady named Rujuta Diwekar, she is a nutritionist and health advisor to celebrities in India. The reason why I have selected her work because it has hit a very personal cord with me and I don’t want anyone to make the health and diet mistakes (read, blunders) which I have made in my life.

Rujuta was unknown to me until I accidentally opened a video of Kareena Kapoor’s interview on youtube. I wanted to close that video and really get-on with my search but then, as I heard Kareena something got my attention. She was talking about losing weight while eating regular rice and roti/ chappati as your daily meal.

I have heard that before, and also heard how white rice is full of carbohydrates, how they make me fat, or I should eat packaged ‘DIET ROTI’ with a chicken tikka every night or probably a grilled fish with brown rice to lose weight. And yes, take fat-free or skim milk or fat free cheese. Although these voices came from every corner I turned to including, my friends, relatives and my dietician, yet something inside me, my intuition, was in total disagreement. I somehow felt that there are many lose ends to these food facts.

So when those things were said by Kareena I couldn’t help, but listen to her. And voila, my intuitive feeling was correct and finally I understood the real reasons and facts of what I already felt in my gut to be true.

We are today a society which is obsessed with being ‘THIN’’. This obsession is unfortunately killing our mental peace, our health and our self-esteem. Women or girls are the main victims of this obsession, and in our craziness with our waist size we are slowly brain-washing the males in our society as well.

In our society, women and girls are pressurized by themselves and by other women in their lives to have figures and bodies of super models. Thin waist, flat chest and a small butt will be equal to happiness and bliss. You gain a few pounds and every aunty and female acquaintance you have will have immediate tips and totkas to help you lose the-dreaded- ugly-weight gain within few weeks.   

The best of those tips are to stop eating rice, roti, home-made salan (gravy), stop taking daal/ pulses- and would recommend high-protein, low-carb, low-fat, Atkins diet, or even better order a meal from that new restaurant which delivers perfect low fat meal, three-times a day, right at your door-step.

You suddenly come into a panic mode, as if you have committed a great sin by gaining weight and that sin has to be repented, at the earliest. You get anxious and start searching the net or your contacts in the hope of finding a doctor or a dietician who can help you in reversing this great sin.

I have been in the above-stated situation many times in my life. My first dietician was a qualified person from Aga Khan University in the year 2001-2002, he recommended me 3 bran breads or 1 roti with any salan cooked at home for breakfast, low-fat cheese, a daily cup of skim milk or a boil egg and an apple for lunch, and a chicken tikka or grilled fish without roti or bread for dinner- combined with walking and gym. What he did not inform me was from where I would get the energy to do my daily work, or exercise if I did not take rice, full milk, or normal cheese. 

Nevertheless, I followed this advice religiously, I joined gym and then I started my first main law internship at a renowned law-firm in 2003.  It was my first experience with High Court, custom, district court and banking court practice. The work was great, learning was amazing. I was getting exposure to so many different kinds of legal work, what could I have wanted more.

However, after working like crazy and enjoying every bit of it, I started to get sick with flu or every kind viral infection which entered the city. I used to work for four days and then take one day off. Then unknowingly, I started to get mood swings, I became over-sensitive and even the smallest things would either made me very sad or very angry. Physical exertion and emotional instability began to hamper my work and, one day out-of-blue, I left my job.

My boss and colleagues were shocked at my unpredictability, the work, the learning, the attention which they gave me suddenly left by me- without any reasonable explanation. My family is very supportive so they backed my decision.

I joined another law firm, things went okay for a while and then again I began to feel week and had mood swings. Thankfully, this time I met a doctor Dr. Zainab Bhaiji who was practicing alternative medicine, she told me to stop taking skim milk and take full-cream milk and she also stopped my bran bread. Thankfully, I stopped getting flu and viral infections, my immune system got better and things were in perspective.

And then my weight was also stable, in fact I was 110 pounds, thin and top of the world till 2007, when I started to gain weight once again, since then it went up and down like a yoyo. 

Around two years ago, I started to enjoy my home-made cold coffee with 1 ½ teaspoon sugar and regular milk. And then, I realized that taking sugar was a sin and it will me make fat, and I will become the weight-gain-cursed person. So I started looking for alternatives and I found SOYA milk, tetra-packed imported from Malasyia. The quality of this milk was that after adding it to coffee I only needed a pinch of sugar and my coffee tasted fine.

Last year, I had my first knee pain, along with late-night muscle cramps and muscle heaviness. Due to the stupid decision of leaving my sugar and regular milk for soya milk I have officially damaged my knee joints and muscles, and had vitamin D deficiency.

What is interesting that even after knowing all about natural and healthy diet, I made that stupid mistake just like the one I  made during my first internship, because the fatigue and mood swings were nothing but the case of simple ‘Bull-Shit low-fat, high-protein, low carb diet- to keep myself thin!’

If you have difficulty in standing during namaz, or any other standing activity, or you are becoming angry or over-sensitive, easily fatigued, cannot do exercise –then my dear friends you have serious minerals, vitamin deficiency in your body. These are tell-tell signs before getting arthritis, high blood-pressure or diabetes.  

If you didn’t believe that your food is important, then get real everyone. These diet plans that are imported from west and other parts of the world are not for us. We really need to get to the basics and our roots and follow the advice of our elders, the food wisdom which we have received but have ignored.

Being comfortable with your body shape and size, eating sensibly, sleeping properly, and exercising without any societal pressures are the keys to feeling good. If you feel good, you will look good and then your body will work efficiently with you. So respect yourself, and your body.

Doing total of 150 minutes of exercise-three days a week, including weight-training, aerobics, yoga, brisk walking along with desi ghee, almonds, cashew nuts, rice, roti, daal, ghee wala paratha or aalo paratha, and our all other traditional foods are the only way to a healthy body, mind and emotions.

Please do watch this video, and all other Rujuta’s videos it will help you get clear about the misperceptions.  

Many prayers and best wishes.

Stay healthy and happy!

Sonya Syed (Day 570).