Midnight snack

Even with the best of my efforts I am unable to sleep, thoughts are rolling in mind- few with reason while others repetitive and useless. So I decided to fully acknowledge my insomnia, and what is a better realization then to give your scattered thoughts a platform to be expressed effectively then to write this post and ventilate what is hidden.

For some time I have been thinking about unconditional love, love that does not need anything in return but only giving to other(s). This kind of love has been encouraged by many spiritual teachers and believed that this is the only way to protect us from living a sad and miserable life.

Nevertheless, when you meet the real people in the real world and the way they push your buttons then the only thing you want to do is to teach them a lesson for good- give them a taste of their own medicine.

My friend and I were talking about the same thing and she said that unconditional love and peace are merely the concept of west because they don’t have to face the issues that we encounter daily. In west everyone mind their own business, parents do not interfere with their children; family gets together only for holidays and above all they do not have the complex inter-connected network of family members like we have.

I being the fierce advocate of peace and presence and unconditional love, this time had no option but to agree with her, because I feel that she is right. But then again is that not the real challenge- it is very easy to be happy when life is going smoothly but the true test of our inner strength and grace comes when we face harsh situations.

Yet this is the point in my life when I don’t want to be nice and courteous to people who behave insensitively, who do not respond with the same compassion that I do. I just want to become hard and harsh to the point where I am able to correct people before they exceed their well-defined boundaries.

Yet I fear that if I become this person, I would turn into an insensitive human permanently. A point, where an angel turns into an avenger.

Would that solve all my problems? Will I get the peace or the satisfaction of showing everyone their true place?

And what would happen if it didn’t work and I end up becoming more upset because in addition of creating more pain I also added one more miserable person, myself, in this already unhappy world.   

So I shall drop the idea of turning into the avenger and turn to my best friend, God, for some sound advice. So I call upon God- after few rings, He picks up my call, listens very patiently to my ramblings and then He says....

....."Sonya, have you seen the sun; how dutifully it comes out daily and shines its light onto the world. Sun has qualities of not only nourishing human body, but it also nourishes the crops to grow and supply food regularly, it balances the seasons so you all can get rains and heat as desired and so much more.

Even though nobody ever thank the sun for rising daily for them and doing so many important things; nor many thank Me for creating sun and everything that they use and need, yet the sun still shines and I continue my blessings and gifts even when both of us are mostly unappreciated.

You know why Sonya? Because I love you all, even when you misbehave, even when you disobey me, even when you are ungrateful, even when you make terrible mistakes, even when hurt you Me..... because love is far more powerful than hatred. 

Love creates miracles, Love heals the incurable, Love turns the ungrateful into the grateful, Love is forgiveness, Love is the understanding of other’s weakness, Love is the acceptance of everyone exactly as they are without the compulsive need to change or control them, Love is respect, Love is light, Love is power and Love is not weakness.

And the same essence of Love lies within you, within everybody. And I tell you one more thing that you will never become an avenger because you are not an angel. 

You are a human being with all your vulnerabilities, weaknesses and strengths. As a human you have a right to get angry when someone does injustice, you have the right to feel pain when you are hurt, you have the right to teach people how to treat you, you have the right to be afraid and you also have right to make mistakes.

I never demand any of you to become angels because I already have millions of them rather what I prefer, is you to become human. Human who falls, who make mistakes, who becomes stupid at times but then he/she gets up, corrects their mistakes- learn from them and finally realize that there is no point in being stupid.

So give yourself a break, my dear! And remember that no one is able to love someone else if he/she is unable love themselves. So be nice to you, love and take care of your self......

           

With all my love to you and the wonderful readers of your blog...

                   Yours lovingly...God."

Sonya Syed. (Day 531)