Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase. It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions. This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
When
you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it… Paulo
Coehlo (The Alchemist).
It was few years when
one day I was aimlessly watching TV, jumping from one channel to another in the
fruitless effort to find something sensible. During this search I saw an interview
of a beautiful lady on the National Geographic channel. She was probably a
zoologist, while talking to the camera her eyes were glistening with tears. I was
unable to move further and felt compelled to hear her, she said as I recall:
‘It
was almost 6 or 7 times when I applied to study for PhD at one of the colleges
at Oxford University. Every time they (Oxford University) rejected my application
by giving frivolous reasons, but I know that they only rejected me because I was
an Indian. They were biased against me.
Yet I am not broken and I have promised
to myself that even if I didn’t get the admission, I will continue to work with the best of my
abilities; because I know that I’m talented and can give so much to my
country - PhD or no PhD from Oxford’.
Then suddenly a
foreigner lady was shown on the screen and what she told then, still gives me goose
bumps. She said: ‘I was visiting India
for my research and one day during my visit to this wildlife garden I met a
wonderful young Indian girl. I asked her, you are so good at your work, are
you doing PhD or have already done it?’
To this, the Indian girl
replied: “I tried to get admission in
Oxford but they always reject my application”.
Foreigner: “Really? Which
college at Oxford are you applying in?”
Indian Girl: “….College
at Oxford’.
Foreigner: ‘Are you sure?
Because I am the Dean of the college you are applying at Oxford, and by the
powers vested in me as the Dean of Oxford University I hereby give you admission
in PhD right here, right now. And also authorize full-time scholarship for your
PhD.
................The Oxford University welcomes you Mahalaxmi!”
I am unable to recall
the college name in Oxford but I can recall how awestruck I felt in that moment
by coming face to face with the Reality, that there is GOD…..
Lots of prayers…
Sonya Syed. (Day 525)
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