Dreams n all

It feels as if I have returned home after a very long time and I am picking up white sheets that are covering all the furniture. There are vague paintings on the wall, saying something reminding me of something but I cannot remember what it is.

That is exactly how I feel by writing today after a prolong pause. Here I was all excited to reveal about my trip and then suddenly I had a speed breaker. Soon after I came from my vacations my dear aunty, whom I always lovingly called Chachi, lost her battle with cancer. Although she was struggling with her illness for quite a long time and we all knew that sooner than later we had to say our goodbyes to her. Yet with all the knowing, you don’t want to know.

It was a painful time but my work was my refuge, classes resumed with full throttle, and finally I had to complete my PhD thesis. I am still working on the thesis, all tensed and anxious. Submission deadline is nearby and my work is far from completion. It’s all being processed in my head but to organize the research into a readable material which is of really good quality is a mammoth task.

It is humorously said that a police officer looks at everyone, even his own family with suspicion because that’s how his mind gets trained. The same thing is happening to me, I have selected an overwhelmingly peculiar topic ‘white-collar crime’- and trust me no one is above my suspicion.

Like the police officer everyone is under my suspicion radar, I am trying to find the nature of subtle financial crime in every aspect of my daily dealings. Sometimes I frighten my family when I tell them how nice people commit monetary scams. Honestly, sometimes I even scare myself, but this is how it is done… May Allah help me with this huge task…..

Anyways things are back to as usual. This is the beauty of time- it heals. Allah has probably manufactured human beings with some mysterious ingredient which helps us to heal, that comforts us and gives us peace.  

I have found a new passion, of ‘traveling’; yes I would like to visit Africa, Morocco, Georgia, anywhere I can get the visa for- and of course the travelling has to be really comfortable; I am not the backpacking-adventurer-type traveler. I am praying to connect travelling and law, and turn that into a career.

But before exploring the world, I plan to see Pakistan. It’s just not me but all of us whenever we get some time off must see the beauty of Pakistan, there are so many amazing locations, landscapes, mountains, valleys, rivers and lake and the best part is food. Local, spicy desi delights anywhere, all the time.

I always wanted to settle at Neelam Valley, Nathiagali or Muree; who knows maybe I will. Just chill and watch the green valleys with a beautiful lake beside my house, read and eat biryani.

Then reality strikes- it is almost 10 pm, a sharp hunger pang, a drowsy mind and then back to dreaming….

May you all dream too….

Good evening!

Sonya Syed. (Day 561)