Skip to main content

My Two Cents

Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase.   It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions.  This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
Post a Comment

True riches

Is it only with me or the rest of you could also sense the ephemerality of days. It was Monday only yesterday and then there is another one and Fridays arriving within two days. Beside an hour which I dedicatedly spend on watching my favourite TV shows most of the day I keep on running from one point to another.
 
However, these days I have the contentment that the time I spend is worth every moment where I am either learning something new or being effective and worthwhile for others. Being of any service to others is such a phenomenal experience and the fact that there is no monetary gain involved does not effect the quality of the work. I for one has worked relentlessly for many years as a lawyer, had power, worked with some of the Bigs of legal as well as the business world and earned few bucks as well but honestly none of those above things gave me any peace. I use to be exhausted, bitter, short-tempered and always on guard with most of the people I met.
 
And now when there is absolutely no power game, no ambitious legal practice, yet I feel like a billionaire and I can’t say if Bill Gates share's the same sentiments about being rich; besides all this there is this constant and subtle sense of peace, joy and security. I am not saying that money is evil but all what I mean is these things could only provide us brief glimpses of happiness and if we want true joy then we need to look for it deep within ourselves. The key is to become joyous, peaceful and extremely grateful in our current circumstances. Money, house, car, etc would always follow as the natural outcome of our authentic joy and peace and it is never the other way around.

I seriously need to settle my sleep pattern so I would take your leave now.
 
My love and gratitude to all.
 
Sonya. (Day 130)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

3 January 2019

After fighting with an alien cat in my dream, I am awake at 1.30 am. It all is followed by a futile effort of building a sleep pattern of 9.30 pm to 6 am. Alas, not all wishes come true at once. No problem I will keep on working. Being a really smart gal I have messed up with my sleep-wake cycle long ago, and today when I accidentally opened Rujuta Diwekar’s video on cortisol on my facebook page- I realized what has been going on with me.  For all of you who are not aware that I am a distant relative of Kareena Kapoor Khan and Rujuta is the link who tied  Kareena and me  together. You all must be wondering why have I never discussed this earlier, why I took so long to disclose my bond with Kareena. Let me explain.   Rujuta Diwekar is a God’s blessing for all the fools like me who for some stranger reason believe(ed) that going on USA or UK-based diet programs would make us patla (thin/ lean). It was Rujuta’s eating desi ghee and daal sabzi ch...
40 comments
Read more

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (ME/CFS): What It Actually Feels Like

Wow! It feels nice to be back to my favourite place in the world, my blog, my love. But today it seems that the world has rotated 360 degrees. As I was trying to figure out how to tap into this new world order I thought the best way is to ask my Higher Power to guide me through. And what a better way to do that, other than recite a prayer ‘Dua Istikhara’ a supplication used by Muslims to seek guidance from Allah before making a decision. If we just read the translation of this supplication: “O Allah, I seek guidance from Your knowledge and power and ask You from Your great bounty. Surely, you can do it, and I am not. You know, and I do not, and You are the Knower of the unseen. O Allah, if You know that this matter is good for me in my religion, life, and end, then decree it for me, make it easy, and bless it for me. But if You know that this matter is bad for me, in my religion, my existence, and my end, then turn it away from me and turn me away from it, and decree for me what is g...
Post a Comment
Read more

My Two Cents

Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase.   It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions.  This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
Post a Comment
Read more