Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase. It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions. This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
I miss reading my books, there are couple of them which are lying in my room waiting for me to pick them up, to smell the fragrance of pages, to cherish them with my eyes and allow them to enrich my senses. But the paucity of time or my inability to mange it properly is the main hindrance and whenever I would get some free time I just become a couch potato.
Concentration is such a fragile entity that if not handled carefully it could vanish into thin air. So is the case with me tonight, there are couple of things on my mind and I am becoming impatient to connect and resolve them. However, there are some delicate matters which are better handled if you do absolutely nothing to resolve them- just wait patiently and watch everything to fall into its place.
Patience is very much a crucial ingredient in the recipe of life as it also another side of faith. Faith on an Unseen Power or Energy; faith on the instinctive feeling and the resolute faith that the wish shall be fulfilled. Although when on the physical plane or on our 3 dimensional reality we are unable to witness any sort of manifestation we become impatient and this is when faith comes in. So it is only better that I too must have patience and the faith in the workings of that Invisible Power.
I wonder why some people in their mind or via their thought create certain indelible impression about others and these impressions become so strong that even those others when try their best to convince them nothing works. Certain thoughts then become the foundation of some of the crucial decisions which people make. But now we know that whatever we see, hear or interpret based on our visual perceptions is completely false as all of it is merely thought-created hallucination. Because we only hear or see or feel whatever a particular thought in our mind tells us irrespective of the trueness or falsity of this apparent reality.
So it is always advisable not to believe what your mind tells you rather pray to God to show us the reality of things, to remove all the veils, to guide us, to lead us towards the solution which is for the love, peace & joy for everybody involved. Amen!
With all the love & peace my beloveds.
Sonya. (Day 132)
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