Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase. It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions. This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
What a crazy week it has been,
doing nothing significant but was absolutely busy. Thankfully, I was successful
in completing my paper work, so what is left now can be managed easily. At least I am
trying to be a regular at the blog, but time is passing by so quickly that days
are changing into minutes.
So what I should talk about
today? There is so much going on, that synchronizing it all appears to be a
huge task. But began I shall, sometimes
our eyes gives us the illusion of what our mind desperately wants. Its like
mirage, I am sure most of you must have experienced it.
In mirage, while in the midst of
heat and sunlight if you look at the desert or on the road, from a distance, it
gives you an illusion of water. It seems that there is water on the road or on
the sand but it is just an illusion because there is no water there in reality.
However,
to the viewer the water appears to be very real, because in that heat our brain
needs water and what it needs, it sees. Isn’t it amazing that sometimes this illusion
is witnessed by many people at the same time.
I first experienced mirage while I
was 10 years old, I was sitting in the front seat of my uncle’s car. It was almost
50 degrees on the road when I saw that there was water right in the middle of
the road. I suddenly jumped due to seeing so much water and asked my uncle how
would he cross this area.
Masood Unlce (my uncle) said, ‘Sonya beta that’s not water its an illusion, which you are seeing due
to heat. It is called mirage.’ That was my first experience of witnessing
illusion.
In our lives too we experience mirage
on many occasions, when we only see what we want to see. To us it all looks so
real that if try, we can even touch it. In this game of mind where illusion and
reality are so mixed up due to our fears and wishes that we can easily get confused.
And sometimes we take very important decisions on the basis of that confusion.
When I see something which gives me pain or induces fear in me - I take it is an illusion. I pray to my Lord that He may lift all the veils of illusions
and deception from my eyes so I take decisions based on wisdom and that I see all that is love, peace and joy.
AMEN!
Sonya Syed. (Day 457)
Comments