Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase. It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions. This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
There is something I
wanted to clear about my earlier post ‘jab we met’. In the end of the post I
mentioned that I wanted to get on euro train to find my Raj. I have received
emails from few of female readers who told me that they are also waiting for
Raj to come into their lives, so they can live happily after.
I am sorry girls but I have to break it to you, please understand
that there is no such thing as Raj- Raj do not exist. Raj and many other characters like him are only in the
imagination of a creative director, amazing script and brilliant acting. Do not
believe these filmy things, they are only for our entertainment.
I remember once Shah
Rukh Khan was asked in an interview about the success of his legendary romantic
pair with Kajol, and the reason behind the series of flop romantic films
starring Kajol and her real life husband Ajay Devgan.
Shah Rukh responded, ‘camera
can only capture acting, it does not have the ability to capture reality- Kajol
and Ajay are real whereas me and Kajol are only acting’.
This coming directly from
Raj aka Shah Rukh clarifies everything brilliantly.
Whoever understands and
respect you, is willing to take care of you, and is sincere with you then that
my friend is your Raj.
Cinderella and similar
fairy tales have done more harm than be of any help to any one of us. There is
a reason why they are called Fairy Tales.
Real people are not
perfect- his hair might be falling and within couple of years he will be semi
or full bald, or there might be dandruff in his hair, or his socks might stink
so much that they can be used to give anaesthesia.
He might have a habit of
leaving dirty socks and wet towel right in the middle of the room. And you my
friend have to pick them up and give for cleaning or might have to wash yourself.
So you see, it is all
about making adjustments, yes that is more proper because I don’t like the word
‘compromise’. Compromise feels depressing. Adjustments have to be made here and
there, along with understanding, forgiveness and compassion.
Love is a deceptive term,
it has been used so many times in movies and stories that it has lost its true essence
so I am replacing love with compassion.
Rather than running
after some unreal images and impossible to achieve ideals, live in the reality
of people because none of us is a perfect package.
We all have our strengths
and shortcomings, if he is not perfect or ideal than my dearest friend neither
are we perfect or ideal.
Most importantly, in any
relationship it is not only ‘what am I getting from the other’. It is also ‘what
am I giving to the other person?’
You certainly cannot
expect to receive love, appreciation, respect, understanding, kindness, sincerity
when you are not willing to give any of it to the other person. Remember ‘to every action there is always an equal
and opposite reaction’.
With all my best wishes and prayers...
Sonya Syed (Day 548).
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