Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase. It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions. This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...
It is the toughest things to digest yet it is the truth that we are mostly responsible for keeping our true joy miles and miles away from us. We stand in our own way whether in the name of our illness or our past or due to our undue attachment and obsession for the welfare of others.
We sheepishly make ourselves believe that the world wouldn’t be the same if we are not there taking care of everything personally or that we are the ones who can protect or support anybody. When the reality is quite opposite; world moves on with or without us, we can only take care of things only up to a certain point simply because beyond that all is handled by an unknown Supreme Power who has the capability to handle million of lives, the entire solar system, and trillion other things all at the same time and that Power can of course take care of our teeny weeny existence as well.
The sooner we comprehend this concept the better it is, there are times when we need to step aside and let life go with its natural flow or else it would be trying to swim against the ocean wave.
The day came and went, with everything getting done as planned and I sincerely hope that life goes on with the same kind of disciplined system.
I am afraid that I have to take your leave because I am keen on calling an early night, so many apologies for the brief post and I sincerely hope to do better morrow.
With all my love…..
Sonya. (Day 157)
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