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Showing posts from August 19, 2012

My Two Cents

Allhumdolillah! I am at a much better place since my last post with series of lab tests, utlrasounds, a mammogram and some other really scary tests, and a gut wrenching anxiety of results. I am doing well thankfully everything was clear except low iron levels with vitamin d3 deficiency. These deficiencies are now on their way to recovery. It is worth noting that I have been struggling with intense brain and physical fatigue since 2019 but not a single doctor was able to identify my problem. Once somebody is diagnosed with depression or anxiety then every health issue they complain about is looked from the psychological lenses. Nobody asked me to check iron, vitamin b12 or vitamin d3 deficiencies even my mum who is a dermatologist always assured me that I am fine and this weakness is just a phase.   It was a phase alright, it engulfed almost 8 years of my life pushed back my career and research ambitions.  This is not the case alone with me but there are many people who silentl...

Rains....

Finally! It rained in Karachi the moment we all have been waiting for, and what a beautiful view it was in the early hours of morning. Everything glistened; flowers blossomed to the fullest and it was a sheer delight to witness this magnificence.   For me rains always have a very special place and even more special affect. I could love rain for the rest of my life- shinning roads with the reflection of orange street lights. I wish I could capture this moment with the subtle beauty of it all. I tried taking pictures but they didn’t do justice to the brilliance of the moment. Paint, yes if I could put it in colors to explain my joy then that would mean a world to me. Recently I have myself in love with painting, the colors and light; so in the search I found some wonderful paintings. Although I do not possess in depth knowledge about art; to me anything that touches your heart is art. Keeping in view my feelings I am posting some exquisite depiction of rains. ...

Operation cleanup

Sitting in the company of my computer for hours is bit burdensome on my poor back and eyes. Today I finally decided to complete all the work that has been pending for some weeks and take up the most excruciating task of cleaning up PC hard-drive. This task of cleaning up I have deliberately delayed for months, no for years. So today I gathered all my stamina and said grace, a prayer of gratitude, before I began the clean up. To my surprise what I assumed as impossible not only became very easy for me but it gave me immense joy and the feeling of freedom. To my surprise I cleaned up more than 25,000 items collectively both from my PC hard-drive and USB. These files were sitting in the computer for some six years now and I just couldn’t gather the time or the courage to check every item and get rid of the unwanted ones. I wish that we humans could have such system of cleaning up of our minds and hearts. I wish we could go into depth of our minds where we can locate all th...

Lost Child

Eid brings along memories, memories of childhood and how everything was exciting and adventurous in those days. How beautiful it was to collect Eidi from elders and then spending most of it on buying cold-drinks and eating junk foods. Meeting up with all the cousins and neighborhood friends was the highlight of the day. Nothing mattered more than how my dress glittered; how my henna blossomed and how my matching shoes, bangles and jewellery looked.   Those were the days when exchanging Eid cards with friends were the most important thing in life. What happened to me, where have I lost that little girl? Where have all that excitement and joy vanished? Is this the price we pay for becoming adults, to miss out the wonders of joy which on appearance look little yet they have infinite value… We grow up and in our rushing around we forget the essence of life. What is this with becoming adults, do we start to play a role. A role, which we didn’t write for ourselves rather we...

EID MUBARAK!

I would keep this post brief but my prayers and affections now and for all the Eids to come shall always remain for an eternity with you all…. Sonya. (Day 343)